SATURDAY, 5/5/2001, 8:30pm HST by Raul and Penfold.

Maybe some of you have seen this before, but I don't think I've seen the half-pint size whipped cream charger before.

In the spirit of nitrous oxide, here's the science on it. Everything you want to know, chemically.

Pissy day in hockey for some of us.

• The Pittsburgh Penguins blew a 2 goal lead and lost to the Buffalo Sabres, taking the series to 3-2 in favor of Buffalo.
• The New Jersey Devils gave up a late-game goal and lost to the Toronto Maple Leafs, taking that series to 3-2 in favor of Toronto.
• Here's an interesting article on Jagr leaving Pittsburgh, which supposedly, is a real possibility.

From Lankus: Why don't we just skip to the point and link the entire list of Mr. T spoofs.

Today's top 10

Top Ten Best Things To Say If You Get Caught Sleeping At Work:

10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
9. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to."
8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!"
7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."
6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."
5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"
4. "Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."
3. "The coffee machine is broken..."
2. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..." And the #1 best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk...
1. " ... in Jesus' name. Amen."

Hightimes got hacked by, no not by some Chinese nationals, but by, who else, the weedheads. And who says stoners aren't productive. See the mirror here.

FRIDAY, 5/4/2001, 7:58pm HST by Penfold

Colorado goes down, AGAIN.

What's up with this. I wonder if people actually listen to their stuff.

If Koni was a grey and black cat.

Oh joy, 3 more years of crap TV to look forward to. If it wasn't for FoodTV and hockey, there would be absolutely nothing good on. Check it out here.

When dot.com market flops, business is good for the repo man.

FRIDAY, 5/4/2001, 11:50am HST by Raul

Just some things to pass your time: BMWfilms is producing short Web films featuring the directing of some big names in the business. There's an Ang Lee piece coming up next week. The short showing now might be worth a gander if you're bored.

Some movement in the league:

• Colorado's Joe Sakic is going to sit out today's game against the Los Angeles Kings.
• The Toronto Maple Leafs tied up their series with the New Jersey Devils, making for a best-of-three situation from here on out. Leafs' forward Tie Domi delivered a delibrate elbow that knocked Devils' defenseman Scott Neidermayer unconscious and received a heavy suspension for this actions.
• The St. Louis Blues made short work of the Dallas Stars, completing the sweep in Savvis Center 4-1.

Well many bytes have been spent on discussing windows XP and its infamous activation "feature." But XP does seem to have some very desirable features, not the least of which is "WinSxS". I have avoided most XP writeups to date because most sites don't really do a readable, sanely sized job. For some reason though, I find the Firingsquid writeups to be pretty decent. Check out their summary here.

Deadhead redux

PROFESSOR Fred Gage and his colleagues at the Salk Institute in California obtained the brain cells that can grow, divide and form specialized brain cells from tissue samples of people shortly after their deaths.

Their achievement, reported in the science journal Nature on Wednesday, could overcome the ethical obstacles of using stem cells derived from embryos.

Well model Niki Taylor is out of surgery for injuries suffered in that accident a few days ago. What caused the wreck? A ringing cell phone.

Don't bogart the spray

LONDON -- Marijuana extracts administered under the tongue greatly reduce pain, muscle spasms and bladder dysfunction in patients with multiple sclerosis, according to results of a Phase II study recently completed by GW Pharmaceuticals in England.

Aimster seeks protection

Aimster's software allows AOL's Instant Messenger service to operate Napster-fashion and let users share files, MP3s among them. No surprise then that it received a letter from the Recording Industry Ass. of America a little while back demanding that it begin filtering out copyright music just like Napster has been forced to.

Aimster's problem with the request is that satisfying the RIAA would, it claims, involve violating its users privacy. It's a canny claim. Aimster plans to introduce encryption technology to scramble data as it passes between users. Bypassing an encryption system runs contrary to the US' Digital Millennium Copyright Act, and so Aimster wants to be protected from being forced to crack its own security technology.

THURSDAY, 5/3/2001, 11:58pm HST by Penfold
The "Late Night" Edition

Just kicking back, eating a banana.

For the two webmasters. Yeah baby, nap til noon.

A place where your friends can get help. Silicon Pines, a care home for the computer inept.

Load up on spam

In a single week, fabulous treasures were mine for the asking.
Great wealth. University degrees. A hunky body. Pristine credit. Bigger breasts. Snoreless nights. Enhanced sexual endowment. Sure-fire stock tips. And a potion to make me irresistible to both men and women.

McBeefyD

SEATTLE (Reuters) -- A vegetarian lawyer is claiming millions of dollars in damages from McDonald's Corp., accusing the fast food company in a lawsuit of "secretly" lacing its french fries with beef fat.

THURSDAY, 5/3/2001, 11:30am HST by Raul

I'm not quite sure how to describe this site. MafiaMob is, on its surface, a Mafia simulation where you can work your way up the ranks of a family, "whacking" other people and doing "jobs." But the interesting part is that it costs money to sign up and you can, in a sense, "buy" clout in addition to earning it. If you gather enough clout to "whack" a family Don, you win $1,000. It's interesting because the currency in the MafiaMob world seems to be this clout, which can be rallied and gathered, can be given as "protection" against "hits," and must be managed by the higher-ups in each family.

It's all very complex, but there is real money being made here. I wonder if there are any legal implications to it?

I don't know what it is, but I find this clip really hilarious. Courtesy of CJ, which is incidentally where I got the MafiaMob link. WARNING: This page has pr0n ads, so don't fiddle with it too much at work.

Couple of things went down:

• The Colorado Avalanche decided they weren't going to take any crap and shut down the LA Kings 3-0 to take a 3-1 series lead. Avs captain Joe Sakic didn't play.
• The Buffalo Sabres took out the Pittsburgh Penguins 5-2, evening up the season at 2 games apiece. The loss has the Pens looking for something different.

Sushi saves

LONDON (Reuters) -- Eating large amounts of sushi, the Japanese fish delicacy now popular in many western countries, may help smokers reduce the risk of developing lung cancer, scientists said Thursday.

Scientists at the Aichi Cancer Center in Nagoya, Japan, believe sushi and fresh fish are the reason lung cancer rates in Japan are markedly lower than those in the United States and Britain, even though the Japanese smoke as much as Westerners.

WEDNESDAY, 5/2/2001, 8:58pm HST by Penfold
The "Bouncing Off the Walls" Edition

Someone is bouncing off the walls tonight.

Swap cams without taking of the intake? Check them out here.

Can't take mad cow disease or foot and mouth? How about horse meat. Check it out here.

What kind of weird, magical things can you do with just kitchen items. Check out some kitchen magic here.

The US government, in the span of one day, went from canceling all military relationship with China, to restoring them. Now what was this about W. and foreign policy? Check it out here.

Looks like Planned Parenthood is going to start selling their own brand of rubbers. Check it out here.

WEDNESDAY, 5/2/2001, 12:40pm HST by Raul

Some action around the NHL: The New Jersey Devils beat the Toronto Maple Leafs in OT to take a 2-1 lead in the series. The St. Louis Blues beat the Dallas Stars in double OT to take a 3-0 lead in the series. Jaromir Jagr will play tonight, and Joe Sakic might play, despite injuries.

Well iWon is feeling the effects of the dot-com crash and has modified its payout structure. Still some good amounts in there, though.

PDA-required class

SIOUX FALLS, S.D. -- In a move that puts it at the forefront of mobile technology use on campuses, The University of South Dakota (USD) of Vermillion today announces it will provide Palm(TM) handheld computers to all first-year undergraduate students as well as first-year law and medical school students. The initiative, the first in the United States to mandate the use of handheld computers by undergraduate students, takes place beginning with the 2001-2002 academic year and affects approximately 1,300 students.

Yahoo! installs pr0n filters

Yahoo's much-publicised new clampdown on porn has left Web users laughing due to its Beavis and Butthead approach to filtering.

The company has been under heavy pressure to remove and/or limit adult egroups on its servers. Last week it decided to remove adult videos from its e-commerce site and it says it has been working on hiding adult message boards as well as adding filters to cut out unsuitable content.

TUESDAY, 5/1/2001, 5:58pm HST by Penfold
The "Early" Edition

It's only 5:30pm, but yet I'm all tired. Weird.

Serohito says, 'I should probably go get a cup o noodles from the car'
Karishi says, 'gah, go get some real food, like a burger or something.'
Aenomi-san says, 'you could always chew some gum. nutritious and good for you'
Karishi says, 'order out.'
Serohito says, 'I'm at the office.'
Serohito says, 'You cannot order food to the third floor of a locked building.'
Aenomi-san says, 'Ninja Burger. We deliver ANYWHERE.'
Kenshiro says, 'God bless those Ninja.'
Serohito says, 'most don't have cell phones to let you know they're there'
Kenshiro says, 'No, they're delivery only.'
Serohito says, 'That could really fly here.'
Kenshiro says, 'Their actual location is secret.'
Serohito says, 'Anytime, anywhere, our snipers can drop you....r food.'
Karishi says, 'you would just call, and they would just show up.'
Kenshiro says, 'You never see the deliverypersons'
Serohito says, 'You call. You don't tell them where you are. They already know.'
Serohito says, 'The only delivery service to never be subject to a prank from the same person twice.'
Aenomi-san says, 'a ninja reaches down from the ceiling to collect the money'
Serohito says, 'With zip lines.'

For those who think that the Survivor TV show really sucks.

An explanation
You got to love this:

What is a CAT?
1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.
4. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
5. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
6. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
7. They're moody.
8. They leave hair everywhere.

Stolen from our friends at LittleWhiteDog.

Seems like the Chinese and US hackers are going to go head to head with each other in a defacement spree. Check out the story here.

Seems that people with those trendy Nokia phones with custom musical tones maybe be intellectual property thieves. Check out the idea here.

TUESDAY, 5/1/2001, 1:30pm HST by Raul
Mayday! Mayday!

Mike Modano is playing today, and Jaromir Jagr is supposed to be back for game 4.

Controversial Russian writer Mikhail Armalinksy, some of whose works can be found here, has created a site called Temple of Genitals where genitals are worshipped and orgasm is sacred. I don't know what else to say about this site. It seems to be somewhat serious. WARNING: There are fairly explicit photos on this site, so don't check it out too hard at work, unless it is safe.

Brenda?

"Charmed" star Shannen Doherty has pleaded no contest to charges of drunken driving and driving with a blood-alcohol level above the legal limit.

Forced to legislate

BUCHAREST (Reuters) -- A Romanian culture ministry official who was photographed cavorting with strippers at a men's magazine launch party has been ordered to draft a new pornography law as punishment, the government said Monday.

Also from Iwon: San Fracisco did OK financing sex change operations for city workers.

Man, so busy these days. Can't hardly get a decent post in.

MONDAY, 4/30/2001, 7:58pm HST by Penfold

Boss coming into the office thursday thru maybe monday or tuesday.

Let us mourn the passing of the Daily Radar. Either that or it's a huge April Fools joke. Got to find me a new content source now.

Virus researchers have discovered of a worm that exploits MSM to transmit itself. Read about it here. A new vector for computer virus infections.

While not Superbowl levels of cash, advertiser are lining up to plop down $800k to run 30 second spots on the final Survivor episode. Check it out here.

MONDAY, 4/30/2001, 2:00pm HST by Raul
The Cram Post

Hmm, Hawaii cops don't only ride Harleys anymore.

Well that intriguing concept E-Ink -- electronically controlled ink particles for eventual use in a "programmable paper" medium -- moved closer to practicality recently. The interesting part of the technology is that power is only needed to create the images, not to maintain them on the page.

Here's a Salon bit on one of the biggest perpetrators of radio suckage. It was educational for me; I didn't know the decline of radio in the '90s had federal legislative roots.

Check out this little poem/song performed live lamenting the fact that, well, computers just ain't what they used to be. Be sure to check out the "Boss key" on the page.

Ok gotta get my sick ass to work.

SUNDAY, 4/29/2001, 7:58pm HST by Penfold
The "Slow Sunday" Edition

Another slow Sunday on the content front.

Meet Jack's newest ad gimmick, the Carnivores football team here.

Also new from Jack in the Box, the Triple Ultimate Cheeseburger.

These guys want the little plane to fly clear across the Atlantic to Ireland. Going 45 mph, they estimate it'll take 40 hours and a gallon of fuel. Read about it here.

Accused spy Robert Hanssen may have taken stripper Priscilla Sue Galey to Hong Kong and gave her a Mercedes, fine jewelry, cash and more, after they met in 1990. Read about it here.

St. Louis took Dallas again in game number two of their playoff series. Doesn't look good for those who chose Dallas. Check it out here.

SUNDAY, 4/29/2001, 6:58pm HST by Raul

What is it? Well, it's supposedly a dolphin dong. Apparently, this site offers anatomically-correct animal dildos, crafted from various, um, photographic representations.

I suppose this has the potential to be cool, but since I neither skateboard nor snowboard, I'll have to let you all decide for yourselves. If you can forgive the uber-trendy marketing pitch, Flowlab has an interesting product on their hands. It's a skateboard that's meant to allow harder carving motions, kind of like a snowboard, through the use of several wheels arranged in an arc at each end of the board. Thanks to Lil for this one.

Free snip

LONDON (Reuters) -- Britain's Ministry of Defense says it has paid for sex-change operations for as many as five serving soldiers.

A spokesman said on Saturday that "a small number, no more than five" soldiers had undergone gender reassignment operations funded by the ministry.

War on drugs about to heat up again?

Washington, DC -- Innocent citizens, seriously ill patients and minor marijuana offenders are among those most likely to become caught in the crossfire of the war on drugs under strategies endorsed by leading Drug Czar candidate John P. Walters, who was named yesterday by The New York Times as Bush's top choice for the job.

Stolen gratuitiously from Stileproject.

With trepidation, I will be trying this version out and reporting on it later. Check it out here.